The Ultimate Christmas Film: It's A Wonderful Life

Every Christmas was the same. After letting our stomachs loose on Man vs Food size portions of Christmas dinner, we nursed our food babies on the sofa, feeling more helpless than a beached whale.

With the family sensing satisfaction and unwilling to budge, my father would seize the opportunity to put on a much-loved Christmas film.

Innocent enough you might think, but when a nap seems more and more imminent it can seem impossible to summon up sufficient concentration for two hours. Last year this normal family trait seemingly plunged to new depths, when my dad put on a film that looked like it had descended from the dark ages. Being the typical young person, me and my sister laughed off the idea of watching a black and white film. Our judgemental behaviour overcame us, utterly convinced that no Christmas film could beat Home Alone, let alone one that we thought had struggled to make it through the Second World War.

My sister and I reluctantly let him put it on, fully confident that we would give it twenty minutes maximum before it bored us to death.

How wrong was I. The longer the film went on, the more I fell in love with it. Set in the fictional town of Bedford Falls in New York, the movie follows the life of George Bailey, a man who has aspirations to travel the world. As the story unfolds, viewers realise that he constantly has to sacrifice his dreams in order to keep his father’s company, Bailey’s Building and Loan Association, afloat.

It has everything a family film could want. George Bailey as the protagonist acting the good guy, whilst also having the classic role of the bad guy, installed in the form of Henry Potter, Bedford Falls’ richest and meanest man. It has every emotion an audience could experience; outright despair, ecstasy, love and a real togetherness.

Just with my stubborn reluctance to watch the film, it really is a movie that could melt even the coldest of hearts.

The director, Frank Capra, was one of life’s great story tellers in cinema, and this film really does flaunt this fantastic quality.  The viewer finds themselves immersed in the character of George Bailey, who is excellently played by James Stewart. They share his frustrations at not being able to leave Bedford Falls, with this irritation growing as the film progresses. They metaphorically punch the air when he finally manages to court Mary successfully. They share his despair when the building and loan association is in great danger of collapsing, and the great sadness when it drives to a potential suicide attempt.

It’s A Wonderful Life also runs along the moral understanding of “A man is not a failure if he has friends”. After his suicide attempt, George is offered the unique opportunity to see what Bedford Falls would be like if it he had never existed, by his guardian angel Clarence. I see this as the magical masterstroke of the film, a teacup ride of confusion for George after what has been a rollercoaster of emotion.

It really is the epitome of a feel-good Christmas film, with a superb cast merely just carrying out the magical story that Frank Capra seems to weave so effortlessly. Ever since seeing it, I’ve wondered how it took so long to become a huge hit, with it now sitting proudly on my shelf.

I am no longer a judgemental twenty three year old who turns his nose up at black and white films. If anything, the fact it wasn’t a colour film only served to enhance the beauty of it. This year is the first Christmas since I watched it for the first time, and I can honestly say I am excited to be devoting two hours of a special day for such a special film.

If you ever need just one Christmas film in your life, make it this one. I dare you to smile whilst watching it. Go on, I dare you.

Too close to your screen? You’ll get square eyes.

Woah, easy there tiger! Don’t get too close to the screen whilst you’re reading this article, you’ll strain your eyesight and get square eyes if you do. How dare you pull that face at me, I’m only trying to help! Be careful though, if you go outside with that scrunched up expression and the wind changes, your face will stay like that!

Wondering what the hell I’m talking about? Me too. However, as ridiculous as they sound now each and every one of us was a sucker for them when we were kids. Some are so inconceivable they’re laughable and others are just there to shake you out of a certain behaviour. One thing they had in common though was that old wives tales always did the trick.

Old wives tales have been around since the first century, where ever since they have been employed as some sort of tool to discourage needless behaviour. It’s been an effective one at that, especially when you think nearly all old wives tales are entirely fictional, or hugely exaggerated. The main aim of these sorts of fables was to either plain scare you out of doing something, or to teach you a lesson where it has a moral message behind it. Either way, after two thousand years it still has the power to be utterly believable, no matter how false and absurd the claim is.

I was genuinely convinced that eating your crusts gave you hairs on your chest, although I can’t understand why at nine years old I thought that was ever a good thing. As for my sister, or any other female for that matter, wouldn’t that send them running in the opposite direction to a pile of crusts?!

Carrots were another one. My grandparents used to religiously tell me that eating lots of them would help me see in the dark, obviously in order to encourage me to eat my vegetables. I however, saw it as a golden opportunity to become my very own superhero. I stupidly thought that if I ate a shedload of the orange stuff I would have permanent night vision, having the power to being able to see as well in the dark as I do in the daytime. I’m glad I didn’t pursue this Marvel comic strip hero pipedream any longer though. I mean, how bad does “Carrotman!” sound for a tough superhero?

The list goes on. There are hundreds of little white lies that our parents and our grandparents used to tell us when we were younger, more than likely passed down from their own grandparents over years gone by. Swimming less than one hour after eating food will lead to life threatening stomach cramps; an apple a day keeps the doctor away; you’ll catch a cold if you go outside with wet hair; if your ears are burning someone is talking about you; chocolate causes acne. The catalogue of old wives tales is virtually endless. I could go on forever listing them, which just shows the extent over generations and generations.

A question I always seem to be stuck on however is, why do we continue to feed these fabricated statements to our children and grandchildren, and in some instances believe them ourselves deep into adulthood? We have a wealth of health knowledge at our disposal, whilst medical science is advancing quicker than lightning striking twice in the same place. This is in an age where we all rush to our friend Google to research answers concerning our welfare, more often or not looking for the worst possible outcomes. Do we then sometimes just take what our mum tells us as a given, just to stop ourselves from logging on and consequently avoiding hours on search engines scaring ourselves stupid?

You’d think that by now we would believe doctors or dieticians over our worries rather than some superstitious fables, but I somehow think that old wives tales belong as a part of growing up. I would even go as far to say that they are white lies similar to that of Santa Claus and the tooth fairy. Yes, we grow out of those two far quicker but I think looking back old wives tales were quite a fun and simple way of keeping their children in check, even if the majority are completely falsified.

So, old wives tales range from the downright bizarre to the somewhat believable, but we all fall for them as a kid. They have become something of a tradition these days, going hand in hand with growing up, as parents and grandparents alike use them to level a child’s behaviour. The scary thing is, we all know that we’ll use them ourselves with our future children, even though we know there isn’t an ounce of truth to be seen.

I know this might sound a bit evil, but I am quite looking forward to tricking my son or daughter into thinking that a sneezing cat is a sign of impending wealth, or that breaking a mirror results in seven years bad luck. Anyway my nose is itching so I must go, I’m expecting someone...

Cool Brittania: Patriotism rules once again.

Us Brits have always been fickle people. We have a notorious reputation for being hard to please and an insatiable appetite for moaning, and with our national media always quick to jump the gun on damning headlines, we probably don’t look too pretty to the rest of the world either.

Some people would attribute this to our lack of identity. Before this year the perception that British people shied away from their ‘Britishness’ burned bright in the eyes of others. I mean, there’s plenty of things that make Great Britain British, but it’s our inability to shout about it that has left the rest of the world wondering where our sense of pride has run away to.

There’s definitely lots of things that the UK is known for. We have the greatest poet of all time in William Shakespeare, the best rock ‘n’ roll music, the monarchy and of course the weather, just to name a few. I get a sneaky feeling however that everyone’s impression of us is somewhat out-dated. I fear that we’re imagined as all sounding like Hugh Grant, being able to visit the Queen whenever we wanted, all dressed in a smart suit complete with a bowler hat and an umbrella. Not only that, they must also think we must cosy up as a family every night eager for the next episode of Eastenders whilst tucking into fish and chips and a cup of tea. Whilst there is some truth in that, a lot of it I could imagine would have been the norm around fifty years ago, not in 2012.

What makes it so hard for us to embrace our country? There could be several reasons, with a notable one being that we are an alliance on four countries, with each one striving for it’s own sense of individuality and national pride. This can of course create tension between them, as we’ve seen with Scotland and England, with the Scots growing ever closer to becoming an independent nation.

The UK is also one of the most ethnically diverse countries on Earth, with London being branded as “the most multi-cultural city in the world”. It’s this multiculturalism and the waves of different ethnicities which have entered Great Britain that have divided the population’s opinion. A lot of the UK’s aboriginal inhabitants have made more than a few comments towards the government being too gracious about the number of foreigners they let reside in the country.

This has also led to the natives being stifled when they’d rather shout about their own country, with authorities too scared that it might upset other religions and ethnic backgrounds. One particular example of this is during sporting events, various taxi companies and other firms have been somewhat banned from displaying the British flag or St. George’s flag in their windows or cars. This obviously caused a lot of anger and widespread criticism amongst the British public with calls for a halt to the number of foreigners allowed in the country.

 So, with uproar garnering pace the question was posed: When would the British public be allowed to show their country off properly, and embrace it by showering it with decorations and millions of voices?

2012 is the answer. Throughout the whole year, the eyes of the world have been on us, watching eagerly. With both the Diamond Jubilee and London Olympics on everyone’s agenda, it had been a long long time since Great Britain, and London, had been the centrepiece of the world. It’s easy to say that we performed, with the Jubilee an extravagant yet appropriate commemoration of our monarch, and the 2012 Games described as the “greatest Olympics ever”. However, did we ourselves get enough room to scream about it at the top of our lungs, or were we restricted to yet another whisper?

Not in my lifetime have I ever seen a greater display of patriotism in this country before. Everywhere you went this summer everyone was embracing the atmosphere, hugging it tight and not letting go until it was absolutely necessary. Name a decoration, and it was there. Bunting was laden from rooftop to rooftop, flags were in every shop window, and the streets were crammed full of people when the slightest whiff of anything to do with a British event was on the cards. The country was like a vicar rediscovering his faith, a blind person now being able to see.

 From a personal point of view, it’s amazing to be able to see the country being let loose on expressing itself, showing the world it’s true colours. There were no controversies, no public disagreements between ethnic minorities, which just makes you wonder what the authorities were moaning about. Then again, they are British and it’s what we’re best at.

Great Britain and it’s people seem like they have found their voice again. If you ask me, I’m looking forward to us further rejoicing in what makes Great Britain great again.

25 things and moments that life would be worse off without.

TV. Mobile Phone. Laptop. Bed. Cuddly toy. These are all things that make a sizable difference to our lives, which made me think about the other little things that would just make life a little more dull without them.

1. Grantly Budgen from Waterloo Road.
Seriously, give this guy a medal. If he fails to remind you of one of your teachers at school then he’ll just make up for that with his dry humour and witty acting. His dancing is also something else. Best thing to ever happen to that show, no question.

2. Snow.
It’s the only thing that can make a binbag look even half decent, as well as transforming a concrete jungle into a winter wonderland. Not to mention that it reduces our country to a laughing stock when it implodes at the slightest amount. Sweden and Canada, please be sympathetic.

3. Peanut butter.
Whoever dreamed up this jar of pure goodness must have been blessed as a child. A year ago I used to hate the stuff, now I somehow love it. Whether it comes on toast, as Reese’s cups, KitKat chunkies or with jam, peanut butter definitely spreads some happiness in my life.

4. People watching.
So this could be seen as a diet version of stalking but be honest, who can’t resist a sneaky peek at what somebody is up to while you’re on a balcony or another suitable viewing point? You never know, you might catch them doing something disgusting.

5. Fraping.
Who cares if it’s childish? A lot of pleasure can be taken from a good frape. While some are just a waste of time, the really inventive and ridiculous ones can reduce a grown man to tears of laughter, especially if the unsuspecting victim doesn't realise for hours.

6. Seeing a celebrity in public.
I don’t know what it is but when we ‘normal people’ spot celebrities we go crazy at the sight of them. We’re always surprised at the fact they’re even walking in a normal place at a normal time amongst normal people, it’s as if we thought all the famous people lived in their own city. It’s useless trying to compose yourself when you see David Beckham in WH Smiths though. Be honest, you’d go mental.

7. Stumbling across old and cringy photos.
Okay, so forget about the initial embarrassment of realising how bad your bowl cut used to look and the fact those trackies weren’t as cool as you remembered, after that they are just plain hilarious. A humiliating picture from times gone by can unlock a cascade of banter and good memories.

8. Finding money on the floor.
Catching a glint of gold is just like being a leprechaun and finding the pot of coins at the end of the rainbow. Seeing a quid or more on the floor and we go wild. Spotting a note is like winning the jackpot, but you feel ten times luckier.

9. Flipping over to the cold side of the pillow.
For some reason this makes trying to get to sleep about a hundred times better and failing that, it just feels far more comfortable. If you’ve yet to try this phenomenon, I recommend you give it go on a hot summer’s night.

10. THAT afternoon nap.
I don’t care how much of an old man I sound, everyone’s done it and everyone loves it. It’s the ideal antidote to a hard day’s work, and the perfect chance to recharge your batteries before a night out. Amazing, right? Not if you’re so tired you oversleep so much you end up staying up haf the night trying to get to sleep again...

11. The traffic light turning green just as you approach it.
This is especially a brilliant moment when you’re running late somewhere and praying for a miracle to get there on time. You know it’s going to be a good day when other lights follow suit and go green, allowing you to drive through undisturbed.

12. Joining a queue right before it starts to get long.
Whenever this happens I’m always counting my lucky stars and thanking myself that I didn’t deliberate an extra couple of minutes over whether yet another pair of socks was the right present for my dad. Looking back at the long and winding line behind me feels like I’ve cheated the system somehow because I know, like times before, I’ll be at the back of it again one day.

13. Bubble wrap.
Whoever thought that this glorious invention that’s used to pad parcels out could provide such enjoyment to so many people? So it’s nothing more than a timewasting tool, but it’s addictive nature for such a lacklustre object serves to be somewhat satisfying.

14. The smell of freshly cut grass.
The sight of a guy on a lawnmower makes my nostrils weep with joy. It’s the definitive smell of summer and if it’s not summer, it makes you yearn for sunshine. I don’t know about you, but I feel a tinge of disappointment that I don’t have a picnic, a football and a few mates ready and waiting.

15. Finding something way after you’d stopped looking for it.
Discovering an item that has been lost in the abyss for a generation is like some sort of small triumph. We hold it high up in the air, pretend we’re Indiana Jones for just a second before wiping our brow with relief that it wasn’t gone forever.

16. Singing in the car on the way home.
Whether it be after a gig, completing a night out or just cruising round random roads, singing at the top of your voice with a bunch of friends is one of the most pleasing activities known to man. The screeching vocal cords of four people seem to oddly combine to make a weirdly beautiful choral sound. Well that’s what I like to believe anyway.

17. The moment a song you and your friends love comes on in a club.
It’s even better when you’ve actually requested the song, it feels like the DJ is agreeing with your music taste. Although beware of the crazy, uncontrollable dancing that consumes you and your mates when such a song is played, the best tunes always seem to bring out the worst dancing.

18. Coffee and bacon.
Probably the best breakfast food and drink combo in history. Yes, tea might run coffee a close second, but there’s nothing more satisfying than waking up to the smell of sizzling pork and then stuffing it in a bap dribbling with ketchup. Mmmm.

19. P’s and Q’s.
Please. Thank you. Yes, those three words do actually make a difference and it’s such a nice thing to hear when you’re either asked to do something or when you’ve done something well. Rudeness only begins to wrap its iron grip round you when you forget those words.

20. When a stranger laughs at a joke between you and your mate.
I don’t know why, but this always puts a smile on my face. I guess it’s just the fact that the banter between you and your friend can make someone laugh while you’re in a long queue, on a crowded tube train or even in the toilets. You never know, it could even cheer them up and make their day.

21. When your stomach changes it’s mind and actually does have room for dessert.
Yes, it’s that secret compartment in your belly that magically appears when dessert is on the cards. How is it that when you’re stuffed full from main course, bloated beyond belief with a food baby ready to pop out, your brain automatically changes it’s mind and says “Yeah, actually I reckon I can fit that brownie in!” I don’t know, but I don’t care either.

22. Ant & Dec.
Simply the reason why I watch Britain’s Got Talent and I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here! year in, year out. The Geordie duo’s seamless witty conversation has entertained television audiences for over a decade now and long may it continue. Their cheeky chappie, charming nature has instilled them as Britain’s best loved TV presenters, and rightly so. Let’s get ready to rumble!

23. Acoustic music.
Rock, R’n’B and Pop all have their plus points. When I’m in the right mood they can all be my favourite music at different points, but there’s something about acoustic music that makes it extraordinarily charming. It seems to echo everyone’s feelings in one fell swoop and seems to unearth a million memories at the pluck of a string. It’s got to be good though, I mean look at Ed Sheeran, he’s a megastar and he’s ginger.

24. Waking up at exactly the same moment from every trip and knowing you’re almost home.
It’s weird how this always happens isn’t it? Personally I always wake up at the junction when we leave the M3, for no apparent reason. However, I do get great satisfaction from knowing I’ve cut out the whole journey by being in dream land, instead of staring at endless motorway.

25. Freshly baked bread.
The world is always a better place when bread is fresh out of the oven. It’s amazing smell is such a homely smell as well, reminding so many people of it wafting through their kitchens. The smell and taste of fresh bread is the sole reason why I considered ‘bread taster’ as a potential career choice.

Zero to hero, winner to sinner.

Goalkeepers are like drummers. They’re both part of a team, they operate at the back of that team, are arguably the least recognised member and may both well have the least desirable role. This must beg the question, why on earth would you ever want to be a goalkeeper, or a drummer for that matter?

Even from kicking a ball around on the playground, the mindset was already there that nobody wanted to go in goal. I remember myself as a 12 year old, feverishly hoping I wasn’t picked on to suffer a lunchtime of balls being kicked at me, whilst everyone was dreading the same outcome. It was like a curse, like some punishment for not being quite as good at football as the others. This power of deduction led to the slowest/biggest/worst/most inept football player in the school being shoved in goal and yes, this was never fair but sadly it was the way things were.

How many of you can say your footballing heroes when you grew up were David Seaman, Peter Schmeichel or even Oliver Kahn? More than likely kids were running round pretending to be Ronaldo or David Beckham or somehow dreaming they were Michael Owen whilst playing for Brazil at the same time. It was always a much better option imagining you were scoring the winning goal for England in the World Cup Final instead of apathetically standing inbetween two jumpers twiddling your thumbs.

The undesirability factor runs right through to the professional game. For starters there is only one place in the team for you to stake your claim, with the other two keepers in the squad having to bench warm in what must be a very lonely place to be. Even though every player gets their fair share of stick for glaring misses, own goals and horrible mishits, goalkeeping errors seem to be highlighted that much more, going to the extent that there are DVDs in shops dedicated to their blunders. I would bet my bottom dollar that more people can remember David Seaman misjudging Ronaldinho’s freekick in the 2002 World Cup than Chris Baird’s own goal against Man City just last Saturday.

Not only are goalkeeping fumbles paraded around HMV, YouTube and Facebook but they come at a cost. Robert Green paid the ultimate price of ultimately sacrificing his England career with his howler against USA in the last World Cup (yes, I knew you’d remember that one as well), but many others have been dropped or even worse, sold on. Take David De Gea for example, hailed as the perfect successor to Edwin Van Der Sar at Man United, yet after a few months of unconvincing performances and the monkeys are already on his back taunting him about his uselessness, subsequently being replaced with Anders Lindegaard as first choice.

Not a pretty life for goalkeepers then it seems. You’re supposedly all wondering why they choose this as their career path? I’ve sometimes thought that myself sometimes but until you put yourself in their boots you will carry on wondering for a long time.
While everyone is dreaming of scoring the perfect goal, goalies imagine of stopping them. In effect they have nothing to lose. Take the scenario of a penalty for instance. A striker is expected to score, it’s almost a formality that he will. It’s almost mortifying for the striker to either miss or place it somewhere where the keeper could save it. However, if the keeper does save it, he becomes an instant hero. So from not even figuring in the equation of a penalty to suddenly saving it and being mobbed by his teammates, it must feel like a win win situation for the guy between the sticks.

Imagine if it was the last minute of the Champion’s League final, you denied the world’s best striker of surely the winning goal, you take the game to extra time and then save the crucial penalty to hand the trophy to his team. It really is the stuff that dreams are made of, but it COULD happen. Do that, and you would be cast in bronze right outside the stadium most probably.

Granted it’s harder for goalkeepers to get acknowledged in terms of awards, with Oliver Kahn’s Golden Ball achievement for being the best player at the 2002 World Cup the only notable accolade in recent times, as well as the fact that goalkeepers command the lowest transfer fees out of all the playing positions.
However it’s not all about that, there must be a huge thrill from constantly being the underdog, the chance to upstage some of the game’s more enviable stars. What I would do to get the opportunity to tip away one of Ronaldo’s scorching right footers that was certain for the top corner and see the smug look on his face drop to the ground...

Anyway, goalkeepers must always be used to having the odds stacked against them but I’ve always thought that the most frustrating thing for a striker is to constantly get denied a keeper who’s on top form. Like strikers who are measured by their amount of goals, goalies live for clean sheets. They pretend the net is their fortress with a huge placard above it reading “Thou Shalt Not Pass”, and for 90 minutes act as a guardian of the goal, shielding it from flying balls. They live for denying strikers, and will protect their goal by any means. Gordon Banks, probably England's finest ever keeper, sums it up perfectly: “Every goal is like a knife in the ribs”.

Goalkeepers seem to lead such charmed lives, going from being hated to being loved in a flash. One minute bottles could be hurled at them for conceding a penalty and then quick as a flash the crowd start chanting their name after saving the very penalty they gave away. It seems a very topsy turvy way to play the game but then again that’s the whole attraction of it. It’s so easy for them to be ridiculed but so easy for them to get praise at the same time, it’s like living on a seesaw.

So this brings me back to my original question that I posed right at the start. Why would goalkeepers ever want to be part of team but feel separate? Well, I’ll leave you with the ideal answer in the form of an inspirational quote from one of the greatest goalkeepers of all time, Lev Yashin: “The joy of seeing Yuri Gagarin flying in space is only superseded by the joy of a good penalty save.”